Depression - Anger turned Inward

Depression - a serious business.

Don't be sad! You're being ungrateful. You're fortunate, do you know how many people are more disadvantaged as you are? Just shake it off! Pray about it, and you'll be okay. How is your relationship with God lately? Your faith must not be strong enough if you're feeling depressed. Trust in God, pray more, and you'll find happiness.

Does that sound familiar? Those are the phrases I often hear from my client's family and friends while working in community mental health. I always wonder, if my clients could just snap out of it or pray for a solution, wouldn't that be nice? But it's not that simple, is it?

So why does depression came about? There is a popular saying that depression is anger turned inward. Often, in therapy sessions, clients experiencing depression are those who have exhausted all their known methods but still failed to achieve their desired outcomes. They might be unable to change their environment or the situation they are in. They put a lot of effort into a relationship, but it didn't succeed. They feel frustrated, exhausted, and those they trust only advise them to just get over it. The ultimate stage of depression is telling ourselves "I am all alone, I am better off gone". Depression can lead to all sorts of serious conditions, including depression with psychosis, and could lead to suicide.

Our society places such a strong emphasis on happiness that it's becoming easier to believe something is wrong with us if we're sad or depressed. However, our incredible body often prompts us to seek help when we feel depressed. One unconscious way we do this is by crying. The American Academy of Ophthalmology explains that emotional tears are increasingly triggered by a wider range of feelings, including physical pain, attachment-related pain, empathic and compassionate pain, societal pain, and sentimental or moral feelings. When we experience pain, tears can signal to others that we need help. When we receive the assistance we need and someone takes the time to listen, we feel heard, we realize we are not alone, and we feel connected.

In therapy, the most effective sessions often occur when clients let go of years spent trying to be "brave" and "strong" for others. They break down in tears, realizing they too need care and deserve connection, rather than solely focusing on taking care of everyone else. Together, we can strive to find a balance in their lives, allowing them to breathe and live a little amidst the chaos.

What is your story? I would be honored to collaborate with you to address whatever is troubling you when you feel ready, so you can finally relax, live, and thrive.

Note:

No matter what your age is, if you are feeling the urge to harm or kill yourself, call or text 988. Veterans, please call 988, then press 1.

LGBTQ+ teens: Please contact The Trevor Project, the leading suicide prevention and crisis intervention nonprofit organization for LGBTQ+ young people. We provide information and support to LGBTQ+ young people 24/7, all year round.